


Inside Out

by Alex_Lyra



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-21
Updated: 2020-05-21
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:07:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24301087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alex_Lyra/pseuds/Alex_Lyra
Summary: Castiel's having a hard time and Dean notices.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Kudos: 8





	Inside Out

~Bend your chest open so I can reach your heart, I need to get inside, or I'll start a war, wanna look at the pieces that make you who you are, I wanna build you up and pick you apart...~

"Cas, you alright?" Dean brought two beers back and looked at the frowning Angel, staring into his hands. 

"I am fine, Dean. Thank you." Cas nodded and gulped the beer down, Dean raising an eyebrow. Grinding his teeth, Cas inhaled quietly and continued to stare down into his lap.

"I let those people down, Dean." Barely breaking the silence, Cas started rocking.

"Cas..."

"No, Dean. I let those people down and those people had families. People that loved them, people that cherished them." Cas whispered a bit louder, looking up with hot tears in his eyes. 

"Cas, this life... It ain't for the weak. It's scary and it's rough, and... We loose people. People we know, or care about, or even barely know. You're the bomb, Cas. You've done your best and at the end of the day, that's all you can go. I know you did your best, Cas. I'm proud of you." Dean nodded and patted Cas on the shoulder and held it there for a few lingering seconds. 

~Let me see the dark sides as well as the bright, I'm gonna love you inside out, I'm gonna love you inside out, let me see the dark sides as well as the bright, I'm gonna love you inside out, I'm gonna love you inside out...~

~

"Castiel Novak, no way. I am not in good conscience, letting you put MAYONNAISE on your burger." Dean glared and took the butter knife out of the Angel's hand, shaking his head. 

"Dean Winchester, I can do whatever I please, I am an Angel of the Lord." Cas glared harder at Dean and tilted his head. 

"Cas, mayo has no place on this Earth, let alone, my homemade burger! "

Cas stifled a laugh and and crossed his arms, hiding his snapping fingers. Dean widened his eyes and tried to make a run for the kitchen sink before the knife disappeared in his hands. 

"Cas! I'm telling you, you don't need any damn mayonnaise on MY burger!" Dean tried to front as angry, as a smile peeked through the hunter's face.

"When you raise me from perdition yourself, Dean Winchester, I'll listen to what I should and shouldn't put on my burger. Until then... Mayonnaise it is." Cas smirked and smeared mayo on the burger, taking a large bite out of it. A white spot on his chin caught Dean's attention and without thinking, he licked his thumb and wiped it off. After what he had done, he looked the Angel in the eyes, blushing intensely; his thumb lingering on the slightly scratchy chin and then yanked away.

"Uh.. Sorry, it's just a habit, I shoulda been more careful with that." Dean mumbled and rubbed the back of his neck.

"It's alright, Dean." If that was a smile on the Angel's lips, neither of them acknowledged it.

~I'm gonna pick your brain and get to know your thoughts, so I can read your mind when you don't wanna talk, and can I touch your face before you go, I collect your scales but you don't have to know...~

~

"Sammy, it's gonna be okay, count for me, okay? Play a game with me, let's just count. Count with me. CAS!" Dean panted and inhaled to try and stay calm.

"You.. you always put me first..." Sam coughed and groaned.

"No, no, none of that, okay? Count." Dean whimpered internally and rocked by his brother.   
Cas, get your feathery ass here now!

"I can heal him." A deep gravelly voice approaching them, kneeling by the younger Winchester, broadcasting a bright white light.

"Make contact with me, Dean, I'm gonna take us home." Home...

Firmly grasping Cas' wrist, they appeared in one of the rooms of the Bunker. Still not letting go and shaking, Cas got Sam settled into bed and lead Dean to the bathroom.

"Dean, look at me. He's okay and so are you. Dean. I promised to keep you safe and I did." Cas' wrist still tightly gripped by the older Winchester, he kept his other hand to himself.

"W-where were you, you ass?" Dean grumbled and panted slightly.

"Jack needed me. I am sorry, Dean. I came as fast as I could."

Nodding slightly, Dean slowly relinquished the beige coated wrist. Looking Cas dead in the eyes, Dean slowly intertwined their fingers and stayed silent. Cas stayed there the whole night with the hunter until he calmed down.

~Let me see the dark sides as well as the bright, I'm gonna love you inside out, I'm gonna love you inside out, let me see the dark sides as well as the bright, I'm gonna love you inside out, I'm gonna love you inside out...~

~  
"Dean, you're going off the road! Pull over and let's get a hotel, please." Sam groaned and threw his hands up in the air, displeased.

"Fine, bitch."

"Jerk." Sam crossed his arms and stared out the window.

"I see a little bee outside the window." Cas nonchalantly tilted his head and continued to stare out the window as well. Dean chuckled slightly and smiled. Pulling off at the next exit, signing in for a hotel, Sam grumbled again.

"They only have two singles! Sorry, Dean, but you and Cas have to share for tonight."

"I don't sleep. I am-"

"An angel of the lord, yes we know." Dean smirked and lightly brushed his hand by the angel's when he saw the glare he had received. Blushing softly, he grabbed his duffel bag and ran off to his and Cas' room. Locking the door behind both of them, Dean yawned.

"I'm gonna take a hot damn shower and then we'll figure out the case in the mornin', 'kay, Cas?"

"Yes, Dean." Cas sat on the edge of the bed and took off his trenchcoat and suit jacket, untying his tie as well. Dean blushed and rushed into the bathroom, turning on the water. Washing up and trying not to think too much, he was interrupted by a groan and what might have been a yelp of distress. Rushing out and pulling boxers and a t shirt on, he stopped short of Cas.

Cas. Wild-haired. Panting. Staring at the hotel floor, pacing.

"This looks like the floor Gabe was... Was..." Cas broke off with a whimper and fell to the floor. Dean rushed over and held his hands back from touching the angel just yet.

"Cas, hey, Castiel, you're safe. You're having a flashback and panic attack. Breathe with me, blue eyes." Cas, still wide eyed, stared at the hunter.

"Dean..." Cas whimpered again and reached out for the calloused hands of Dean's. Holding the soft hands in his own, Dean slightly squeezed.

"It's okay. I understand. Sammy couldn't handle a specific song for a while and I couldn't handle looking at knifes for a while either. It's okay. I've got you. I do." Dean whispered and slowly gathered Castiel into his lap and rocked him. Cas tucked his head into the crook of the hunter's neck, and wrapped his arms around the blonde's torso. Still rocking, Dean started to hum Metallica into his ear and slightly played with Cas' hair. After some time and noticing that the Angel's breathing had slowly evened out, he carefully moved him into the bed, going to sleep on the floor.

"Stay..." Blue eye staring right into the blonde's soul and gently gripped his wrist again. Dean nodded and wrapped his arms around Cas, petting the jet black soft hair, and breathed softly onto the side of his neck. Cas put his hands on the hunter's chest and made fists by his cheeks, closing his eyes again. Dean chuckled and rubbed circles onto the smaller's back as he himself fell asleep.

~I'm gonna love you inside out, your love, inside out, I'm gonna love you inside out, I'm gonna love you inside out, inside out, your love, inside out,   
I'm gonna love, I'm gonna love you inside out...~

~

A slight tremor woke Dean from his sleep, not opening his eyes just yet, but pressing soft kisses to Cas's temple.

"It's okay, Blue. Shh.." Dean mumbled and feathered small kisses where he could reach. Cas sniffed and pressed closer to Dean, gripping his t-shirt into his fists.

"I got you, baby. You're alright." Dean blushed and held the smaller closer to him, laying his head onto his own chest. The tremors slowly falling still, Dean drifted back off into sleep. Cas kissing his collarbone softly and mumbling in Enochian quietly.

The next morning, they awoke to still find each other tangled up in one another, smiling sleepily. Dean kissed the Angel's forehead and brushed the hair out of his face, Cas beamed back at the hunter.

"'Angels of the Lord don't need sleep', my ass." Dean teased softly and traced his finger across Cas's stubble and along his nose. Cas smiled and rubbed his hand over Dean's chest softly.

"I feel better, Dean.. Thank you." Cas whispered softly.

"Of course, blue eyes."

"Dean?" Cas stopped rubbing.

"Yes?" Dean kept tracing his finger over the Angel's face softly, making direct eye contact.

"I think I love you."

"I think I love you too, Novak." Dean stared at the ceiling and beamed, as Cas surprised him and pressed his soft lips against his rougher ones.

Small touches led to bigger steps. 

I'm gonna love you

I'm gonna love you

I'm gonna love you


End file.
